Progress

	The Good Old Days	Progress
1	You fondly remember the last time you had chicken, because you only had some on special occasions.	Lots of fast food offerings; from scientifically produced, tasteless chicken.
2	Your parents made a fuss about how you never visit.	Your parents make a fuss about how you never call.
3	Your Dad thought your Mom was extravagant with 10 sets of clothing.	You don’t know how many sets your wife has.
4	You didn’t know the word “unisex”, and even if you did, will not say it in public.	You are careful what you let your children see on CNN.
5	You complain about your poor finances.	You complain about your poor finances.
6	Ghanaians came over to Nigeria looking for jobs.	Nigerians are going over to Ghana looking for jobs.
7	Being gay meant being happy. Being queer meant being odd.	Stick with happy and weird.
8	Teachers showed affection as if they were your parents.	You are afraid if a teacher showed affection to your kid.
9	“Stealing” is what happened when someone broke into your house.	“Stealing” is what happens when someone is elected into public office.
10	You have a job so you can have money to marry and have kids.	You are seeking a job so you can have money … to have money.
11	Millionaires had way too much money, and were few and far apart.	You live next door to 2 billionaires that don’t know how much they have, and are competing to buy you out.
12	We had a total of 10 school books per term and learned to speak good English and we could use our acquired skills at work.	Our kids visit the doctor for the strain 30-40 books put on their young backs, and they can’t tell him what’s wrong with them in English.
13	Things stayed in vogue for a whole year.	Fashion statements are made and are over before you finish the instalment payments for an item.
14	“Hello” was informal for “good afternoon”.	“Hello” is formal for “Hey”.
15	Cars were a luxury because you didn’t need one.	Cars are still a luxury because you can’t afford one.

©M. S. Mahmud 24 Ramadhan 1431, 3 Sept 2010.